Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
