I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
