He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
