I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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