I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
