I wish I only lived at night.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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