Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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