Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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