this beer tastes like vomit already
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: donโt get cum on anything!
Youโve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ๐๐๐๐
Randomize