Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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