we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
