i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
