I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
