I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
organizing the empties. That sober.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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