16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
