At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
