Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
