why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
