every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
and she was petting her beer can
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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