Life is so much better after having sex.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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