I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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