You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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