Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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