That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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