Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
