he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
My vagina is very pro this idea
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