You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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