i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Green mimosas i think yes
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
