2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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