What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Randomize
