why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Randomize
