Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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