Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
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