I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize