dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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