About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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