I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
