He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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