Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
