Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Randomize
