I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
