I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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