Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
