would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
