He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
