carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
are you so shy because you have an std?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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