If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I love black thongs
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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