don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize