I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
