The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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