he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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